The 7 Masks of Unconscious Unhappiness

The Slow Burn  |  The Stuck Spiral | The Quiet “I Can’t”  |  The Selective Should  |  The Expectation Illusion  |  The Meandering Monkey  |  The Lost Spark

Mask #6 - The Meandering Monkey

The Core Problem: A Scattered and Unsettled Mind

Feels Like: Constantly thinking, but not focused; busy but not present; repeatedly reviewing what happened or “what ifs.”

  • “My mind just won’t shut up.”
  • “I can’t stop thinking about this.”
  • “Sometimes, I just zone out.”

The Slippery Slope: An overactive “monkey mind” can create chronic tension, reinforce false beliefs, and cause unnecessary pain and struggle. 

The Fix: Follow The Path of Alignment to quiet mental chatter on command, so you can relax and focus on what really matters.

Book an Alignment Discovery Call

The biggest challenge with The Meandering Monkey is it rarely feels “bad enough” to force the change you really need.

Overview: The Meandering Monkey

Your mind is always moving.

Sometimes that feels good — it’s creative and exciting and propels you forward with whatever you’re doing today.

But it’s also draining, distracting, and – let’s be honest – pretty annoying at times.

Even when you’re still, you’re not really still — thoughts race, plans unfold, conversations replay.

  • “I should have said this…” or,
  • “What if I could try and do that instead…?”

As the mind constantly moves on to the next thing…and then the next, it misses the peace of being right here, right now.

How It Works

Here’s the good news: your mind is trying to protect you.

It is trying to imagine, to plan, and to remember everything, in order to help you live the perfect life.

The problem is: as it pulls the past and the future into the present moment, it crowds out the stillness, the well-being, that is already yours for the taking.

This constant mind chatter is the classic monkey mind — jumping from branch to branch, idea to idea, without ever landing long enough to feel at peace.

You might find yourself:

  • Daydreaming or distracted — unable to focus as you go about your day.
  • Worrying about what’s next — instead of moving forward from where you are.
  • Reliving stories about the past — wondering what old conversations or events might mean.
  • Repeating the same thoughts — but never clarifying and resolving them.
  • Keeping yourself busy — because you don’t know how to be still.

You might tell yourself that they are just random thoughts…and yet you can’t seem to extract yourself from them.

And to make matters worse: if you ever try to “quiet the mind,” it just feels like more thoughts come rampaging in.

…Even though you know peace comes from presence.

…Even though you know you can’t think your way into stillness. You have to return to it.

But with The Meandering Monkey, you just don’t know how.

As we tune-in to the stillness that is already within us, we train the mind to feel secure. The monkey mind releases as it realizes it does not need to control. 

Risks of Inaction

The biggest problem with The Meandering Monkey is it rarely feels “bad enough” to force the change you really need.

It’s like an amber service light on your car – it’s not ideal, but it’s not urgent, and you definitely don’t have time to go to the mechanic today.

But when we don’t get it checked, we don’t know what other problems might be stirring under the hood.

Often, we let the mind ramble because we don’t want to face the deeper fears and limiting beliefs we think we might find.

But ignoring those thoughts is like letting your engine burn, because you were afraid to change the oil.

Practically, it often means:

  • We can’t relax — as we develop a chronic, low-grade tension or anxiety.
  • We reinforce false beliefs — as we repeat imagined stories about the world.
  • We feel unnecessary pain — as we focus on unwanted negative thoughts.

Plain and simple: we lose out on the joy that would be ours, if only we could just stop and center in this moment.

Guiding Questions

Use these questions to explore how The Meandering Monkey is showing up in your life.

  1. If you have 5 minutes to yourself, can you be still? Or…do you reach for your phone, mull over your day, or think about tomorrow?
  2. How often do you worry about things you know don’t really matter, but you just can’t stop thinking about?
  3. If you try to meditate, does it feel like instead of stillness, you find even more thoughts rush in?
  4. Imagine you’re hiking with your partner, who you see everyday — what percentage of the hike do the two of you spend chatting?
  5. What would it feel like to be completely free of thought? Nothing to worry about. Nothing to plan. What would it feel like, simply to be here now?

The Path Back To Joy

It sounds counterintuitive, but you cannot quiet the mind by trying to stop your thoughts.

Because a “quiet mind” is actually just an aligned mind — a mind that feels confident, secure, and at peace, even as thoughts meander through it.

When we think from a point of alignment, we find there is more spaciousness within our thoughts.

We don’t “stop thinking” — we rest more clearly into the space behind, or between, each thought.

This begins by finding a single moment of relief…over and over again.

As we tune-in to the stillness that is already there within us, we train the mind to feel secure in itself.

That gives it permission to put down the weight it is carrying, to stop over-thinking, and to allow us simply to be.

It’s a virtuous cycle, as this deeper resonance guides us to act more freely, which feels like clarity, productivity, and progress.

The monkey mind releases as it realizes it does not need to control.

It feels like coming up for air after holding your breath for years.

As we take that breath, we find it becomes easier and easier to return to our natural state of joy.

Next Steps

To eliminate The Meandering Monkey, first find space between your thoughts.

 

When you schedule a 1:1 Alignment Discovery Call, you will learn simple techniques to quiet the mental chatter, reconnect with your inner stillness, and rediscover what it means to feel calm, clear, and in-control.

Get Started with a Free, 1:1 Alignment Discovery Call.

Schedule a 1:1 Alignment Discovery Call
Thank you, Kyle, for your work. I am really happy with the shifts I have made with the lessons from The Joy Within. As suggested I will return to them, time and time again.
Leslie Gaudet