The desire to be loved is a universal one. One that we often long for all of our lives. We put priorities aside, we settle, we drive ourselves nuts, all in hopes of achieving that warm and fuzzy feeling.
Affirmations are certainly a great way to attract love and romance with the law of attraction. What most people don’t understand, however, is that love, and ultimately happiness is a natural state of being.
As humans, our minds are ultimately deciding what we do and don’t deserve. We fear pain and vulnerability and prioritize comfort and consistency.
The biggest thing holding us back? Ourselves. Our capacity for love can only grow as big as the room that our mind creates.
While love blocks can make it feel impossible to expand that room, this guide is an excellent start to finding the freedom to manifest the love that you deserve.
How To Clear The Top 5 Love Blocks
1. Feeling Unlovable
In the words of Stephen Chbosky, “we accept the love we think we deserve.”
Feeling undeserving of love, while not a conscious choice, is the most prominent block that we face when manifesting love.
The best way to truly understand your worth is to identify and respect yourself as an individual. What is the best thing about yourself that no one complimented before? What do you bring to your own table?
Identify the traits you’ve deemed unlovable. What are the positives of those traits? We must learn to love and accept our flaws as strengths, rather than burdens.
If you’ve seen The Help (2011), think of this scene. Now give it a try with yourself in the mirror.
2. Being Afraid of Getting Hurt
Love comes with risk, that’s what makes it so special. Opening up to someone can be scary, whether it be a romantic partner, a friend, or a family member, there is always a possibility of getting hurt.
After a breakup, there’s a good chance you’ve thought “I’m never getting into another relationship again.”
But when our fear of hurt outweighs our decision to be happy, we’re closing ourselves off to any new, meaningful connections.
But how can we let go of this fear?
Challenging ourselves to accept the fact that things and people change is a great start. Try to look at your previous relationships as a lesson about your own needs and desires, and remind yourself that a life without change would be a pretty boring one.
As the saying goes, you miss 100% of the shots that you don’t take.
3. Fear of Vulnerability
While you may be able to maintain a surface-level relationship even with a fear of being hurt, intimacy is key to that happy and healthy love we truly desire.
Intimacy, however, is impossible without vulnerability.
Happy and healthy love means having a mutual understanding and appreciation for our partner as a whole. It’s knowing each other’s ins and outs in the most honest and open way possible.
Intimacy stems from openness and honesty, both of which require a foundation of vulnerability.
Without this, we will never feel fulfilled. Rather, we will only continue to live by other’s perceptions of us, ultimately building the very wall keeping us from love.
4. Believing That Everyone Leaves
Breakups are tough, but they are a part of life. While the fear of abandonment is a real (and often scary) one, it’s important that we still allow ourselves to feel.
By spending our time worrying when our partner will lose interest or leave, we’re shifting our focus away from our own happiness.
Couldn’t that time and effort be invested in the relationship itself?
In fact, by maintaining the belief that everyone leaves, we’re increasing our chances of attracting those who will do just that.
Instead, try to get comfortable with yourself and focus on the present moment. Whatever’s making you happy right here and now should be your main priority. What’s already happened has already happened, and what hasn’t, doesn’t exist.
And when relationships do end, remind yourself that everything happens for a reason. What’s meant to be will be.
5. Believing You Need Someone to be Happy
Virtually everything around us is pushing the motive that love = happiness. Thus, oftentimes, we rely on others to make us feel a sense of fulfillment.
In reality, however, love can only amplify pre-existing mindset. It cannot create a new one.
It’s important that we consider whether we’re looking for a partner to add to our lives, or someone to “complete” or “fill” a feeling of emptiness.
The only way to ensure avoidance of the latter is by recognizing and accepting the happiness we bring ourselves.
Relationships can add to that happiness, but it cannot create it.
When manifesting love, keep these blocks in mind. However, it’s important to remember that love is not the answer to every question. Happiness is a conscious choice and love is simply an amplification of what already exists in your mind.
For more tips on removing love blocks, check out our blog, How To Stop Blocking Love and Remove Emotional Blocks.